It's not a cry you can hear at night, it's not somebody who's seen the light...

My name is Lara. I love Joy Division, which is totally the most important thing about me. You should also know I am quite sarcastic without having a firm understanding of sarcasm. True story.

I was born in Seattle, Washington, grew up in Kalispell, Montana (AKA HELL), moved to Melbourne Australia in 2003, and Christchurch New Zealand in 2010. I studied half a Bachelor of Fine Arts~Theatre Studies in University before switching to German so I could study abroad in Vienna (2001). Hence, I have studied English, German and Latin at a University level.

I am currently studying a Postgraduate Diploma of Social Work at the University of Canterbury in Christchurch, New Zealand while living in a flat affectionately known as the Lesbian Flat of Doom, with my friends _honeyspider and phfa and my cats, Ariadne and Echo and Alison's cat, Helios (they don't have LJs, they're not old enough yet), all of whom I love dearly.

I'll add anyone to my f-list if they ask, so feel free! I spend most of my time writing, talking about writing, or thinking about writing while watching Most Haunted or something Tim Minchin, Hugh Jackman or Dylan Moran related. Or singing. I love singing, and I'm actually good, which tends to help! I can play the flute and the piccolo, the guitar and the ukulele, and I used to play the viola but then I sold it to a 3-fingered man. True story.

( A very important thing to know, is that I ramble. So there is more under here! )

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♣ Characters on FS
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♣ Characters on Nevermore

It's my own little piece of the LFOD, right here on the interwebs!

( Don't Tread on Me! )

I just recorded myself singing O Holy Night for the heck of it. I did it twice. One was pitch perfect and lovely and everything I wanted. The second one I did, Ariadne came meowing and tugged on my skirt, hoping I would help her catch moths (yes we do this, my life is so full) and I crack up in the middle of the song and then sing the rest terribly off-key because I'm laughing. My camera isn't great for operatic voices either, but...you know, cest la vie!

The one that all went wrong is SO the one I am uploading. I think it is more me. I AM sorry for the potentially busted speakers. Don't listen to the end too loud. My voice is kind of high-pitched and laughing and singing don't mix.

By the way, the reason I filmed the bookcases when I was singing, is because I look like I am in terrible pain when I sing. Just be glad I saved you.

ALSO I took a photo of my re-dyed hair, since the recordings are all yellow. Of course the colour still looks strange because I'm a pale (smarmy) ghost. Whatever, it's red. No regrowth any more finally.

( Blahblahblah get to the video, darnit. Okay, okay! )

I was looking up Tim Minchin photos on Google because, you know, I do that all the time now. And I found one of him in the RMIT theatre I believe he booked for the 2005 Melbourne Comedy Festival gig where the lady from Edinburgh saw him which jumpstarted his career. And I was looking at the photo and there's a sign in it that says 'Swanston Street' and it made me so homesick for Melbourne.

Damn you, Tim Minchin! ...I take it back, I love you forever.

That theatre was where we went to go see Chris' movie premiere and that is the street the beautiful bathhouses are on and Melbourne Central where the movies live. And that stupid fountain right in front of this theatre that looks like a post box and with the water shortages it can't run anyway most of the time. Which is fine. It's ass ugly. (EDIT: AHAHHA I found a photo which makes it look all fancy. It's nice. And even in the photo it's still just a square with water coming out. Usually there's garbage floating in it. Lovely.)

It's such a weird feeling being homesick for a place. I have never really been homesick for the US, despite missing the people. This time, it's kind of the other way around (PLEASE DO NOT TAKE OFFENCE TO THIS, seriously, I miss the people, but you are not my family) and I miss the place a lot. I do not miss water restrictions and overcrowded trains and rampant dinnertime racism and I am like...200% happier here. I love Christchurch. I love New Zealand. I still miss Melbourne.

( So here. Have a little bit of Lara's Melbourne! )

Day Two: Nine things about yourself.

Alrighty then. Things people DON'T know and won't be horrified to read. Hmmm.

( Nine Things )

I was feeling down today (LONG story) so I decided to do something constructive to take the feeling away (social work training, oy) so I wanted to make a post of all the photos of people and places and things that mean something to me. And when I started to plan it, I realised just how long it would be if I put everyone into it. And that made me feel so amazing, you have no idea...

I did it anyway deciding I would only use photos I have taken myself (or by my family since I wasn't at the reunion to take those and I didn't take the ones of me as a kid, but you get the point!) to cut down on spamming random Hugh Jackman pictures ;). Not everyone that should be here is including my friends in Australia. Woot, Peter, Laura and Ness, I have no (not blurry) photos of you!! And there are other friends who aren't on here, but be that as it may, here it is. Some of my happy things.

( To me you are perfect )

I'm buying a kitty and we're going to pick her up tomorrow (with the help of our wonderful Woot!) and I am so excited! Kitty!

This is important for me. I've been waiting to get a kitty since 2001.

:D

Longer rant about today later because this should be documented but for now...

I AM NOT STRAIGHT!

It really pisses me off when people assume I am. And then I get annoyed when people don't understand WHY that upsets me. I guess I can deal with the assumption because a lot of people assume MOST people are straight unless they conform to a stereotype they have created in their own heads and they see in the media, but to then not understand why I don't like being called 'straight' because it's not 'normal' so I should be glad to be assumed to be normal....

...big fuck you.

I kind of realised that the reason I finally had enough of Heather Doney's shit (she was a girl I knew in high school and she was unkind but we kind of put up with it) when I turned 18 and finally cut off all contact with her, was because of the way she handled her best friend coming out. Heather came to ME sobbing saying that something was wrong with Amber and when I asked if Amber was sick, because my first assumption was cancer, Heather said, "she is sick!" And when I asked what she had, Heather said, "she's bisexual!!" And since I was pretty much struggling with my own sexuality at the time, that was NOT what I needed to hear. As soon as I got away from her (and moved to Uni) I was able to admit it to the people closest to me. She would have made that unbearable.

I'm not sick. I'm not abnormal. I'm just not straight. And if you don't like it, I really don't care anymore.

The problem with LJ: we all think we are so close, but really, we know nothing about each other. So I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me. Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about. Ask away.

Then post this in your LJ and find out what people don't know about you.

Fun!

Also? Last night? I hurt my neck trying to breathe! Stupid asthma. Now I can't turn my head left. :| So I went to the doctor AGAIN for the third time in a freakin month to get my lungs sorted out. And they tell me "Oh, yeah, the inhalers you have been on would have opened your airways, sure, but they wouldn't have reduced any mucus in your lungs. Which is why you would feel better for a while and then worse again. So here, let's prescribe you with an inhaler that will do both.

WHY COULDN'T YOU HAVE DONE THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE! I feel better now, but if I get worse in two weeks again I am going to CRACK IT AND HAVE A HISSY FIT THE SIZE OF EUROPE :D I spent the entire night awake, struggling to breathe. Blah cubed.

But I did get a free swine flu vaccination because I am in the risk factor group meaning if I did get it, I could suffer from complications. YAY free things! And since injections are like...one of the few things people are normally afraid of that I do NOT fear, this pleased me. Because I am strange.

Today on Facebook, someone who shall remain nameless pointed out that my fiction is strange to them. She was complimenting it, but said the 'Antichrist stuff seems a little weird'.

Thank you. Thank you for pointing out the obvious and yet still completely missing the point.

It's supposed to be absurd!

My Peter Kemp is a complete dork. Heroic in an unheroic way, yes. Amazingly gifted at saving people from themselves? Yes. Incredibly intelligent and resourceful, yes. The Antichrist? No. He is a man who knows about eleven languages and spends most of his time reading ancient tomes. He first kissed a girl when he was twenty-four. The fact that a group of religious nutcases think he is the Antichrist because they saw him survive through his head being chopped off is absurd! It's meant to point out that, when faced with something people don't understand, they will jump to whatever conclusions happen to fit in their little construct of the world. These cultists (sure, in the basest sense, they're Catholic but they're also INSANE, keep that in mind) saw something they didn't understand because they don't know about immortality, and they attributed Peter with a role he does not fit into.

The Templar are akin to those nutcases who try to force their beliefs on others and say things like "GOD TALKED TO ME THROUGH MY TICKLE ME ELMO! HE SAID AHHAHAHHAHAHHAHHEHEHEHHHOHOHOOHOHAHHAHHHEHEHEHHHOHOHOOO" and you back away slowly. Except the Templar happen to be armed with lovely inquisitorial tactics to get across their beliefs. It's hard to say "no, you're insane" when you're hanging from a rack. That's why the Catholics (for one) used to DO IT. The idea of Peter being the Antichrist is supposed to feel like a false note, because it is. Peter is the victim of a group of religious fanatics. Not religion, not Catholicism. Fanaticism. The people I believe to be the most dangerous in our world, and they can be any religion, creed, order...anything. I just happen to write mine as an offshoot of insane Catholics because Peter was a priest before he left the clergy. IT IS IN NO WAY AT ATTACK ON THE CATHOLIC CHURCH OR RELIGION ITSELF.

Might I also add it's urban fantasy. There are supposed to be fantastical things in there. Demons, vampires, werewolves, whatever. The Antichrist, however, does not happen to be included. Like in Buffy, these beings are metaphors and symbols for something else. Peter would like to state for the record, that he's just a man who is suffering for other people's beliefs. Something that happens far too often. My writing (at least the Templar story arcs) are symbolic of that on purpose. And the only way I can express my displeasure about that, is with my fiction. So if you don't get it, don't read it.

Seriously though, if I ever were to publish this stuff and the Pope banned it, I'd be one happy chippy. :D "BAN ME, YOUR POPEYNESS! For I wish to be a best seller KTHXBAI!"

EDIT: If you want to read what I'm ranting about, the link is here http://community.livejournal.com/darker_london/tag/the+templar though you have to remember the most recent stuff is at the top, AND not all of it is public. In fact, 90% of it is not.

AND HAHAHHAHAH Check it. Peter's tag is HUGE. And it has all the tags under it I still haven't converted over. Which means he'll be at over 1,000. ARRggghhhhh! Whyyyyyyy. But yes, see what I mean by most of it being locked?