It's not a cry you can hear at night, it's not somebody who's seen the light...

I was reading my usual Irish news online site which is more Irish-American than actually Irish. I read it for roleplay, shut up. But anyway I stumbled across an article that made me smile.

They are doing an exhibit of Irish immigration to Montana in Cork!

Now my family immigrated to New York, but my step-father's family is also Irish and they immigrated to Anaconda. Most of them then moved to Helena, but I think this is awesome. Especially since one of the US' biggest St Patrick's Day parades is in Butte, Montana because it was a major Irish settlement. It's in the middle of buttfuck nowhere but goddammit, they drink green beer and have street fights on March 17th. No. Really. Every year they arrest huge amounts of people for being idiots after the parade and too much drinking. It even has a mention on wiki on the Saint Patrick's Day PAGE.

Anyway, I just thought this was really awesome. Montana gets overlooked a lot because hardly anyone lives there. Hell, some Americans don't even know where it is despite the fact that it is the 4th largest state. It's the size of GERMANY. Makes me happy.

First time since I was 14.

He is with my grandmother, helping her in the wake of my grandpa's death.

Dad lives in South Carolina now and his Southern accent is back and it was so strange to hear. So different from when I was growing up. Much more like my grandparent's voices mixed with my brother's. That was weird. When I first heard him I was like "Boy? Why are you in Florida?!" but then he was all Southern and awkward.

We had a conversation. An actual conversation, and it was strangely nice. I'm not expecting too much because I don't feel like getting my hopes up and having them all dashed to pieces, but it was nice to talk to him and not feel such anger towards someone who isn't even in my life any more.

He said he was proud of me. I rather liked that.

Imma eat my McDonald's and watch a lot of crap.

Last night I had a dream my grandpa died. Followed by my lovely Auntie Ann being diagnosed with some horrible thing blah.

Less than an hour ago my sister called and said my grandpa had died. I knew it had to be bad when my sister was on the phone. (♥) He had a stroke in his sleep and died without really waking up which is good. I haven't seen him since I was about 15 though I talked to him a little in 2010 right before I moved here. He was a lovely and funny guy when I was younger but I have basically already grieved for losing him from my life. So this feels weird. I mean this is the man who survived a tree falling on him.

I called my grandmother. I saw her much more recently during a visit to my sister's house and again talked to her in 2010. She sounded not great, and understandably so since she was with him for over 60 years. It was actually a good talk, despite me fearing it would be really awkward. She sounded a little better by the end of it, though how long that lasts, who knows. I feel...numbysad. That's a thing. But I'm going to send my grandma a letter and some pictures. I hope it cheers her up. She said she always wanted to see New Zealand so I'll get some pictures printed of the places around here too.

If it turns out my aunt is really sick, I will be so pissed off. I am pretty sure my subconscious made up the disease though, so we might be fine.

My sister and her family are leaving and I'm totally bummed because they're basically my favourite everything.

I thought I would get some things done today after they left because I wouldn't have as many people occupying my time. But I woke up this morning shaky and sick. My hands always shake, but they're doing so visibly. And my kneecaps are shaking. Which is a really weird feeling. I can't tell if it's bloodsugar or extreme tiredness or something else. But basically blah to the extreme.

And I am not pleased to see more more more shaking in Christchurch as well. Dammit.

It's already 2012 where I live. Here in Montana it's still 2011, but only for a few more hours.

These last few days with my family have been perfect. Yesterday I bought sheet music for Malik and we wandered around, talking. I played games with them all. Kelly keeps asking me to tell stories because apparently I'm hilarious. My aunt is here too, which is awesome. And oh oh, Malik had to do this project on 12 Angry Men for his English class. So he wrote, played and recorded a song in like an hour. And it was awesome. So incredibly creative, it's ridiculous.

I can't wait for 2011 to get the heck out. Here's to 2012 not consisting of jumping from one natural disaster to the next, combined with personal disasters that never seem to end. But really, I wouldn't change these last few days for anything. If 2011 always ended this way, I would slog through it again and again.

My family is amazing.

Last night I went to bed at 7 pm and woke up around 2 am. I watched the Doctor Who Christmas Special (and cried my eyes out at the end of it <3) and then fell asleep again. My mother just came to wake me up. It's 3 pm.

WELL. THAT'S A LOT OF SLEEP.

Stupid chronic fatigue.

But Christmas was lovely! And I had a dream that the girls and Woot and I moved into a new flat (I don't know why...) and it was haunted by these protective ghosts. And there was a stream in the backyard. And the kitchen was awesome. But you know, I AM rather partial to the LFoD so I don't know why I keep dreaming that the girls and Woot and I go apartment hunting. I think it's just because I like buildings.

I blame www.foxtons.co.uk No. Really.

Finally finished all the Doctor Who though there is a new one on Christmas day. But then after that I have to wait for the new series at the end of 2012. And then I decided to watch David Tennant's video diaries of his last days on set and he's so emotional and that wasn't a brilliant idea. I feel a bit bereft which is ridiculous. Ah, first world problems. It just fills me with such nostalgia to watch, and the new series was brought back to life so well. I love that instead of restarting it, they continued it on. Makes me ridiculously happy, even when I am not fond of certain characters, or I a goggling over a story line. Or Mark freaking Gatiss has to write an episode where dolls stalk you. *shudder*

Oh, and I have decided that I will forgive the show for revealing the Doctor's name (though I don't think they will) if it is Stormageddon. But only in that instance. Stormy+Doctor=OTPP.

Tomorrow my mother and I are finishing Christmas shopping. I learned to crochet today too! In like...twenty minutes! But it hurts my hands so I couldn't do it for long. Still, I managed to help make a scarf for my niece and that is AWESOME. And speaking of my niece, my sister's family will be here on Thursday night and I am SO EXCITED! I can't wait eeeiiiii!

We also went to see my other niece's choir concert today and it was lovely. Though they sang Cat's in the Cradle. Which is just mean! Darn sentimental songs.

EDIT: THEY CHANGED THE COMMENTS AND I DON'T LIKE IT! Dammit, LJ, stop changing things!

I feel like I have been all over the universe today but we just went to buy yarn and stuff. Stupid chronic fatigue. My niece and her friend Tatum came over the other day and we had a BLAST and then I slept for like 14 hours. And they were only here from 2 to 8. Six hours of energy expenditure = 14 hours of sleep for recovery. Son of a biscuit.

And now I will go learn to crochet. And then I will write things because my soul needs expressing :D And then more sleep.

Oh. And stupid Silence in Doctor Who. Stupid, creepy, Silencey stupidheads. Ahem.

If they EVER reveal the Doctor's name, I will have a shitfit. I am not kidding.

I was in the crappiest mood (hormones lol) and then suddenly I'm all excited and happy. Thanks a lot, body. You're lovely.

BUT I am going to learn to crochet tomorrow! So I can make scarves! I so want a Doctor Who scarf homg. And we're going shopping for wool so my mother can make me some potholders and dish cloths for our LFoD kitchen. Also I am looking at the easy patterns for stained glass so I can start more projects. I have this gorgeous triple shamrock pattern I will make for me, but I am going to make that one at the class. I can do the easy ones in the basement. My mother set up a workshop because she's adorable. We're also looking for presents for the niece and nephews as well.

And then my sister and her family get here on Thursday. And on Friday I might go to Sherlock Holmes 2 with Maliky and Travis which yayyyy! I am so excited :D

<3

I'm in Missoula! Jayannpants lives here! She made cupcakes! She is a cupcake artist, I am not even kidding. She made lavender and lemon curd ones which homg. Her parents came to town and took us to breakfast at Paul's Pancake Parlour which sounds lame but dear GOD I love it so much yay.

I went to Jayann's dance performance and she was amazingly awesome. Beforehand, I had some time to kill so I walked around the University campus. I randomly went to the bookstore to see if my Laramie Dean was working so I could surprise him and make him make :O! face. He wasn't there, but randomly, my uncle Leo was. So I was like "Leo Gallagher! HEY!" and then we talked about my cousin Dylan who speaks Irish and is going back to Ireland in January. Leo was in Missoula for the Griz football game last night which they won so hard (GO GRIZ, RAWR). He was like "I haven't had a break in months so it was nice to come here and have some downtime." And I informed him that we were aware because we see him on the news every night. He's the county attorney, so he's always in the court...news...part. Anyway, it was nice and random to see him hanging out in my old University bookstore.

Also while Jayann was at nutcracker practice I was talking her teacher randomly and then to this man wearing a Vietnam vet hat who was in the waiting room who had overheard our conversation about New Zealand. He asked me "why are you in New Zealand, I've always wanted to go there" and mentally I was like "Lara, do not tell a Vietnam war veteran you don't like the US because of the blind patriotism..." So I kind of mumbled something about reasons. But seriously I had random conversations with people I don't know and didn't freak out.

IS THIS WHAT NORMAL FEELS LIKE BECAUSE IT'S WEIRD AND NICE.