It's not a cry you can hear at night, it's not somebody who's seen the light...

I am finished with this university year. My final essay is in and I sat my final exam yesterday for the law class. A class I attended twice and studied for on the day before. I had to answer 4 essay questions. I managed to basically remember perfectly the legislation and regurgitate it for the exam for two questions. The last two, I think I remembered 90% and 80% of the legislation respectively. BUT I also have a special consideration waiver for the exam so if my result is terrible, they throw it out, and if it's not, it gets marked easier.

So that was my today. Going to the doctor and then going shopping. And then getting home and crashing because apparently instead of spending the rest of the day writing like I wanted to, the stress of the past...ever...got to me and I basically passed out. I woke up to eat some potatoes and soon I am headed to bed again.

Hopefully tomorrow I will have more energy! Then I can write. And begin to look forward to the trip to Dunedin and Fiordland as well as my trip to the US in about three weeks. Before that I need to clean my room like whoa. Organisation, ahoy!

Back to sleeping allll the time.

Bleh.

I so overdid it on the days I had energy. I have spent the last two days basically sleeping and nothing else. Both days I went to take 'a nap' and ended up sleeping twelve hours and when I woke up I was really confused. I have been awake three hours now and I am ready to go back to bed.

Must stay awake. Have class. And if I have another cup of coffee I'll be shaking too hard to take notes...

Alison gets home tonight though omgomgomg and I will wake up when she gets here I DON'T EVEN CARE because :D:D:D Then she has to leave me again. I can sleep while I'm alone!

Those days I had energy though...gosh they were good. And it did go to show me that this won't last forever even if it does feel like it.

And I looked up plane tickets to the US yesterday and it's cheaper for my parents if I stay for like...two months. Cheaper by 1,000 dollars. Which is the choice I would make if I were buying them! It'll be nice to get away. And if I sleep this much in Montana, at least I'm not missing anything ;)

I just took this IQ test for funsies (I was watching QI and they were talking about IQ) and it says I'm ~gifted~. So that's a nice little boon to have at 9 in the morning.

Also I woke up at 8 and couldn't get back to sleep. And all I could think was "OH YAY I'M NORMAL AGAIN" because I never used to be able to sleep and since May I haven't been able to stay awake and even when I am I'm exhausted. I feel fine now. I so hope this isn't still just the magic effects of the Vitamin D which will taper off. I don't want to turn back into a zombie again. I can think now and it's awesome. You never realise how bad something actually is until you don't feel it any more and you can compare.

CURE ME, FALSE SUNSHINE IN MY VEINS!

The LFoD is so clean. The kitchen, you should see it. CLEAN. Laura came over to keep me company yesterday too and we had curry and pie and watched Ghost Hunters International. I love that show, hush.

Once I finish the episode of QI I paused in order to take validating online IQ tests, I shall write more and more and more! Taking all the opportunity I can to do so, in case this bout of normalcy goes away!

Helios just ran across my face. Boys, pfft.

EDIT: Helios is actually chewing on my knee through the duvet. Then Echo pounced him and he got all pissy because she interrupted his...chewing. I have no idea what he is even doing. But it made me giggle.

Probably that will stop if he rips my duvet cover!

You must all be so glad when you see a post from me these days. I can feel the excitement from here. I am so sorry this is all I talk about now. But seriously, I can't think about anything else when I feel so wretched.

I finished my law essay and went to class today. Class was okay because I was just sitting there. And I actually enjoyed being a loud-mouthed and opinionated pushy girl so that was nice. Then I had to go turn in my essay on the 6th floor of the history building. I didn't walk up the stairs because my knees can't take it, but I decided to walk down because I hate elevators and hey, we're still getting enough aftershocks that I filled my waterbottle up before I even got in the elevator to go up just in case one knocked the power out and I got stuck.

So I was walking down the stairs and I kept shaking. Mad, knee-knocking, entire body-trembling shaking. And it got gradually worse and worse as I went down. When I was on the third floor, I just burst into tears because I was shaking so badly. Strangely enough, my lecturer was returning to his office which is on the third floor so he whisked me in there and got me some tea while I sobbed on his desk about how I can't even walk down a flight of stairs. I finally managed to suck it up and head for the bus. During the ride Simon was kind enough to keep me distracted so I didn't sob the entire way home.

I napped for several hours and then ate tacos and lots of fruit. I still feel like hell. I think it's actually just one of those days I am stupidly overtired and my blood sugar isn't cooperating and there's nothing I can do about it. I have been eating all day to try to fix it. It tends to work itself out eventually but in the meantime I feel rotten inside. I seriously just ate a huge meal, a nectarine, a mandarin and a banana and I feel like I haven't eaten in days.

I hate my stupid body. (And I have to keep telling myself I am not dying because of my anxiety. SUCH FUN.)

The past few days have been eventful. First, I got Echo a collar and decided she could go outside, since she doesn't just hide under the porch and refuse to come out like certain tortoiseshell cats I know. Her first day outside and she gets stung in the throat by a bee. It swells up to gigantic proportions and I have to take her to an afterhours vet which costs a heck of a lot of money. So guess who gets to stay inside for a little while now. :| Not happy.

The other night I woke myself up screaming! I had been having ghost nightmares all night, but the one I woke up from and finally decided to just stay up involved a room in the basement of my childhood home. But the room was Evil. And we were hanging around outside it, who knows why. One of the cats wandered in and Leah decided she didn't like him in there and she was going to get him out. I watched from the door frame and this random doll was running around to be freaky. Dolls terrify me. And she handed the cat to me but she didn't follow. I went back for her, calling her name. I found her in the corner, staring dead-eyed up at a ghost who had taken her form but twisted and terrifying. And the Leah-ghost turned towards me and rushed me. When Leah-ghost was a centimetre from my face, that's when I woke up screaming. Not.Awesome. Unless it was in a movie. Then really awesome.

Went to the doctor to renew my prescription and complain that I am still tired. I explained that I had even slept about 10 hours last night and woke up feeling like I do when I travel and don't sleep for two days. So tomorrow I have to have MORE tests done. Joy of joys. She said now it's probably just post-virus fatigue, but she wants to rule everything out.

Me? I just want to sleep for like...days. Humph.

But I did get a 1949 edition of Chaucer's Poetical Works in stunning condition from the Uni bookstore's used books shelf for incredibly cheap. It's so beautiful, I want to marry it.

I got the second part of my loan finally. Six class weeks before the end of the year, but at least that means all the work I have done this year wasn't for nothing!

We have been watching Star Trek: The Original Series and it is awesome. Even if the 60s-era misogyny is rampant. I love Bones, Spock and Kirk. They are so in a three-way relationship.

Mexican food and The Trip last night was awesome too! I love Rob Brydon and Steve Coogan! They are brilliant together. And now I want to watch A Cock and Bull Story again sometime! Their banter is the best thing about it. Their banter and Dylan Moran hanging with Gillian Anderson.

Since I had slept basically the entire weekend, I was up yesterday for 24 hours. So the last 45 minutes or so of the movie was hard to stay awake for, but I'm so glad I didn't fall asleep. And not just because no one needs to hear my great honking snores. I would have been so sad to miss it.

Sometime this week I need to start my law essay and make an appointment to get my prescription renewed. But things are looking up, even if I am still really tired. And soon there will be curry! :D And then I will eat more of my giant dinosaur-lolly from Laura!

..last night I had a dream Neil Gaiman was my dad. It was awesome. Even if, for ONCE, I wish I could not have a lucid dream. Strangely, being aware that your dreams aren't real even as you dream them is kind of tiring.

The sleepysleepy virus has been going on since about the 20th of June. It's almost September. So that's nice.

I wasn't tired tonight (after sleeping all weekend long) so I have been awake all night, though I only woke up at 10 pm. So I haven't even been up for 12 hours. But I have plans tonight! So I hope I can nap before then!

How many more months before this is chronic fatigue syndrome? Four? If it lasts that long, I might go legitimately crazy...

I just spent about two and a half hours wrestling with this damn computer as it tried to update a billion things. It froze and error-messaged me and arrrggghhh technologyyyyy! And then I restarted it and it would be fine and then freeze again. So I got on the old desktop to check my University email (that is all I was trying to do, seriously) and it wouldn't sign me in because Java needed to be updated. I am so pleased with myself for not pitching a fit. I am not a patient person with technology. But I finally got this laptop working, and I cleared about 150GB off the desktop which will hopefully mean it runs more quickly when Leah uses it! I have more things to transfer from it to this laptop but after that it will basically just be all of her things which will be nice. So much crap just clogs it up.

Blah blah boring.

I am so boring lately. All I do is sleep. I decided I couldn't do my second placement because I seriously can't do it physically. I have a few days being slightly energetic and then I sleep and sleep and sleep. I'm sick of it. All I did today was wrestle with the computer. I have been up for three hours and I am absolutely exhausted.

Fuck viruses! And technology! But not you! <3

I made it to six hours awake! After sleeping for 16. I didn't even know my housemates went out to a comic convention thing this afternoon. Ali was telling me about it and I was like "You weren't gone!" and she was like "...uh huh!" Maaannnn. Comic conventions are my THANG too. Because I am a NERD. But sleep. Sweet sleep.

Now I have to go do that before I pass out. But I made it six hours. And I actually accomplished things while I was awake. I didn't get to all my tags, but I can finish the rest when I wake up. Which hopefully won't be in like twenty hours...

Frak this virus!