I don't think it's fair that I am having major allergy issues/a cold while I am trying to fix my anxiety issues but oh well.

Since the quake I have been having panic attacks. Full blown, throat tightening, chest squeezing, hyperventilating, "oh god oh god, I am dying right very now" panic attacks. I have always have anxiety issues and anyone who knows me or reads this and even some people who meet me on the street will know that because I don't hide it, or do I think I should have to. But increased adrenaline (thanks earthquake) makes brain chemistry go haywire and so my anxiety levels have risen to unmanageable levels. I was awake all night last night because I was sure my throat would spontaneously close on itself for no reason at all. I know it won't, because that is ridiculous. I know that. But I decided it would anyway and so I was on the verge of a panic attack the entire night. Thus is and anxiety disorder, though I have never had it get this bad before.

Today I saw a doctor who was lovely, and she prescribed me a short-term pill for the panicky stuff, and a long-term one to try to fix things. I never take meds so they tend to knock me around, so getting used to them should be such fun. But mostly I just want it to stop, so I'll put up with anything. And then I get to go to counselling on Monday. Here's hoping I feel well enough.

From: [identity profile] halfbloodme.livejournal.com


*wraps you in a world of love and tea and chocolate* It's understandable that your attacks have increased since the quake honey. I had a bad one on Friday night where an ambulance was called and all because a so-called friend slagged me off publicly and none of my friends who live close by could get to me *sighs* You're not alone my darling and I couldn't be without my meds because I just can't cope without them, sad but true.

From: [identity profile] artemisofluna.livejournal.com


*foreverhugs* The other night my friends were at a party and I called a helpline because I was panicking and the woman was so distinctly unhelpful she did actually STOP me panicking (for a moment) because I was so annoyed. But that made me realise I need more help. And thankfully I got ahold of my friends after that and they came home to be with me.

Thank you, Nat. You are ever-wonderful :D
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